Home Sick

Well my mom and dad were supposed to be coming this weekend, but plans changed and now they aren't. I haven't done this in a long time and I don't know what sparked it last night, but I just bawled like a big ol titty baby after I got off the phone. I was really looking forward to them coming. I thought that I had covered my disappointment pretty well, but my mom called me back twice and my dad called me once.. for small talk. They knew I was upset, which made me feel bad because it wasn't like a big deal or anything, I was just excited. I thought with time that would go away or something but I guess your never to old to be home sick and miss your mom and dad. We are going to get to see them next weekend, which really works out just as well. They are going to see my little brother Ft. Worth. Honestly I am realllllllly excited about this. We haven't seen him in several months, and my son has been asking about Uncle Bake (we are still working on those L's) and Jenn. So I am happy that I will get to see ALL of my family next weekend!!

Anyway, I was just a little overwhelmed by the fact that I cried like a 2 year old last night because I missed my mom and dad... Everything is fine now. Anderson has a Halloween party to go to tonight, and we are excited about that, then TRICK OR TREATING tomorrow...
Then it will be NOVEMBER.. holy cow. Where did this year go??

Time to Wake Up..

I just found out from my doctor that the abnormalities in my blood work is my liver. It isn't functioning the way its supposed to. He didn't say much, just that he is concerned and wants to see me back in 6 weeks were we will do more blood work. I asked him if that comes back the same as the last did, with a slow functioning liver, what will be the course of action? He said that he doesn't want to get into all of that right now, we will just see what the blood work says next week. The thing that he told me that has me really worried is he asked me if I drink a lot. I was like WHAT? I said no, I don't. I told him I do drink on special occasions, but that is just in a social setting. ( I don't even order a drink from a restaurant hardly ever) But that got me think like cirrhorsis (sp) of the liver, I know it does no good to what if, and there is no point in it. I have been diabetic for 3 years now and I guess its time for me to get my act together. I have a husband and a son that need me to stick around for a couple of years.

My uncle recently passed away from diabetic complications at 61, and that is just not long enough for me. I have said this until I am blue in the face, I want to do better. I do. Its just hard when every where you go there is sweets and stuff that I love, I have this thing in my mind about diabetes. I hate it. HATE IT. Its like being part of this big club or something that you just don't care to participate in. Counting calories and carbs -- blah blah blah. This is nothing new and I bet each person that might read this or that I might tell about it knows at least 2 people that have diabetes also. So why am I being a baby about it. I don't know, why cant I get all of this down? I don't know...

I just want to be normal. Now that I am done whining, I will see what happens in the six weeks, but for now, I am going to try to make it better and start to undo whatever damage it is that has been done. I have a good, compassionate doctor and I am trying to get control mentally. So this is a new journey, here we go.